“我是否可以使在一份爱里认知到自身的与众不同，宝贵”，这也是一个人的深层次要求。人全是自以为是的，最后大家爱一个人，是由于在这个人的眼中大家见到的自身是非常值得深爱的，被爱惜的，爱提升 了大家的自尊心水准，假如认知到被珍惜，那么就能要我觉得自身非常好。一段情感得来不易，丧失之时更为痛楚，大家毫无疑问不期待自身的情感丧生于“误会”，因此 ，了解他恋人的方式，及其怎样表达你需要的方式便至关重要了。下边大家来剖析男生常常误解的失效感情表达状况：
"Does he love me?" "What do boys like about one's behavior?" a student left a message on the message board, saying: she and her boyfriend have been together for three years. Her boyfriend left her job in downtown Shanghai for her and rushed to Beijing. At this stage, they are ready to get married in advance, but she is still a little confused about their feelings. It is reasonable to say that he can leave everything he knows and works to find himself True love, but why do you often feel that he is "indifferent" in daily life
The other party's "illness" is described as follows:
(1) The students sprained their feet and sat on the side of the road to send messages to them.
His response was "does it hurt? How can you be so careless The trainees thought that he would happen right now.
(2) The trainee sent a wechat on Sunday saying that I was depressed and wanted to chat with him.
His response was "commodity, what are you doing? I'm still busy. I'll talk to you later. " Then there was no follow.
(3) There are also many times when students say "what are you doing?"
His response was "colleagues out there." Then there was no more. The girl asked, "why, although he says" I love you "every time, I can hardly get what I want when I need him most? Does he really care about me? Do you really love me? "
A lady in love is like a group playing a lottery game of "does he really love me?". Countless moments want to marry him, countless moments want to break up with him, one love, one do not like, destroying the girl. The answer to this question is good. They have been in love for a long time, but the answer is not very good. So how to treat this difficult point in the emotion?
Today's commitment to love brings us to analyze how to distinguish "does he love me?" Want to know more exactly how much he loves you? Now, add the mobile wechat # mobile wechat # of the consultant, respond to the "article content", leave a message on the message board of your expectations and scruples, and the consultant will carry out one-to-one Emotional Analysis on you according to your situation, so as to help you get out of the clouds and see the real world.
The final result of this puzzle is that the scores on both sides are offset, which is immediately equivalent to "sense of belonging". How can the feeling of "one will love, one will not like" happen? It's actually very easy to understand. In most cases, it's actually a problem of "expression of love". Because of the difference of logical thinking between boys and girls, the key of their expression is different, so the experience of "how much love" is always swinging back and forth.
To feel deep love, three criteria must be considered:
(1) Reply immediately to "I wonder if you are the most important person in your heart?" This question
(2) He wants to say "I like you" in the way she wants
(3) Does he make you feel like "I'm a very good person"
First of all, the question of "am I number one in your heart?" is a deep doubt in people's hearts. Ever since I left my mother's arms, we have been looking forward to meeting the most desperate love we met at the beginning. When the couple's constant suspicions and disputes are confirmed, is it not in the hope that the other party will prove that they are the most important person. Second, the way is very important. Sometimes he felt that he was expressing love, but she didn't necessarily feel it.
For example, he felt that supporting his family was greater love, while she felt that love must be waiting. As a result, he felt that he had put in everything, and she felt that they had not moved. Sometimes, boys can't understand the way girls have to do. For example, boys are not good at words, they don't have the ability to work, and they can express themselves in the way they have to do. In addition, there are differences between men and women, family relations, culture and art, and design styles for communication, which will lead to incorrect interaction and ineffective interaction of love. That's how an emotion fades.
"Whether I can make myself different and valuable in a love" is also a deep requirement of a person. People are all self righteous. In the end, everyone loves a person because in this person's eyes, what we see is very worthy of deep love and cherished. Love improves everyone's self-esteem level. If we recognize that we are cherished, then we can feel very good about ourselves. It's not easy to get an emotion, and it's even more painful when you lose it. There's no doubt that you don't expect your own emotion to be lost in "misunderstanding". Therefore, it's very important to understand the way his lover and how to express your needs. Here's how boys often misunderstand the expression of invalid feelings
1. "I'm still busy, just a moment" - in this kind of expression, girls often feel "not my first key".
That kind of reply has been vaguely showing the style of "girlfriend at work". But in fact, the boy is likely to be really busy. He thinks it is a man's responsibility to work hard and let his beloved girl live a happy life. Women feel that in the eyes of boys, only work, not waiting, is not the main performance of being kind to themselves.
For example, there is a couple, male in the east of Beijing work, female in the west of Beijing work, the work is busy, the distance is very long, sometimes two weeks can see each other. In the rhythm of their own lives, they are all in the critical period of their own post rise. They rent houses close to the enterprise, and they are not prepared to live together, so they have to fall in love like that.
But that kind of physics long-distance produce is the mental state of restlessness. At this stage of growth, emotion is not the first key thing, which is really a practical problem. On the other hand, they really like the other side, if they want to come down, buy a house, get married and have a baby. So expressing your love at this moment is the first key. As everyone knows, this boy is really "real". Every time he receives his girlfriend's mobile wechat, he often replies, "I'm still busy, just a moment."
Naturally, he is really busy, but he hasn't seen it for a long time. In the long run, the girl's self-confidence is getting lower and lower. They gradually quarrel, cold violence, and finally break up. Sometimes, the end of an emotion is so simple. If girls can understand the work pressure of boys and use communication instead of tantrums, what would be the result?
"Because you are working hard for our future, we are all busy, but your excessively simple response makes me think that I am not important in your heart. If you can, I hope you can take time to call more and make me feel comfortable." In a marriage relationship, it's very important to express your own requirements. If you attach great importance to this relationship, don't let the other party "guess".
For why, I do not say you are clear! Want to know how to express the requirements correctly? Want to know how to practice this kind of big truth in the emotion? Now, add the mobile wechat # mobile wechat # of the consultant, respond to the "article content", leave a message on the message board of your expectations and scruples, and the consultant will analyze your emotional problems one-on-one according to your specific situation.
2. "Drink more hot water" - there is no empathy in this kind of expression
"Drink more hot water" is known as the "perfunctory care" of straight men. Because there is no "Empathy" for other people's attention in this sentence, it does not make people feel that they are different and cherished. What is empathy? Is really with you, is to understand your love every moment, with your experience together. ——It's the ultimate way to express "your necessity.".
"Empathy" is one of the five abilities of true love. There is an empathy in social psychology, which is to treat things from the perspective of others. If you learn to think from the other side's heart and deal with the surrounding things, you will have an empathy, and you will feel the pain and happiness of the other side and enter into a role exchange. Why "drink more hot water" is ridiculed by many girls?
The reason depends on the fact that when boys say this sentence, they don't communicate from the girl's perspective and don't bring it to the girl's experience. I can't feel the girl's pain, or I feel that I can't deal with the girl's pain. I only think of "drinking more hot water", so... On the contrary. The girls didn't bring themselves into the boys' experience, and they couldn't feel the boys' dilemma of "not understanding the solution", so they got angry and felt that the boys didn't treat themselves well.
So the problem comes, how to solve it? You can choose the method mentioned above to express your request. Every time your boyfriend gives an incorrect answer, you can correct him. The boy is not a fool. After two times, he will understand what you want to think. Don't equate "drink more hot water" with "she doesn't love me". Use social skills to distinguish and guide correctly. He will be more and more inseparable from you
3. "I'll cook you a meal" - this kind of expression is not "I really want to think about it".
A boy is very gentle and careful. Every morning, he will prepare a fast food lunch box for his girlfriend in advance. He feels nutritious. Every time he works, when he sees a girl bring his fast food lunch box, he feels full of happiness and takes good care of his girlfriend. But after a quarrel, she found that the girl didn't like to eat the meal. She felt that bringing the meal made her have pressure, and she liked to go out to party with her friends in the afternoon. It was more noisy and chatty. She didn't like to eat alone.
In the long run, it has become a kind of work pressure for her, and she can't refuse it or say it. Determining what is required is the most important step in expressing love. For many boys, love is to reason with you when I quarrel, help you analyze and make you deal with it. For many women, to say love to me is to listen when I'm quarreling. If I'm angry, don't argue, give me a hug, or when I'm in a hurry to get out of my house, no matter how bad I say, I need a hand to hold me.
Maybe we are all expressing love and passing on 100% of it in our own way, but the other side only receives 50% and 30% of it in our own world. The attenuation coefficient is a part of the "communication requirements" that we have not done and that we do not master each other. Several times, the opening student said, "what are you doing?" The boyfriend's response was "colleagues are out." Then there was no more.
Does he master the communication design style and requirements of the trainees at the moment? She's embarrassed to say "guess you." she said "what am I doing.". She felt that her boyfriend should regard what he said "what are you doing" as "estimating you", but the boy obviously didn't understand, so he did respond: "what am I doing". This shows that the students lack a kind of working ability in their feelings - emotion.
Emotion is a kind of function without loss